Sometimes it just feels so right...

It is not every day that I get to spend time with my son.  Mostly just on weekends, and mostly just a little bit of time here and there.  Tonight as I was driving home with him in the car, I was struck with how easily the conversation flowed.  There were moments, sometimes long moments, of silence, but in general it was just so easy to talk to him and listen to him.  I find myself smiling when he starts talking...  Sometimes he doesnt even realize that he has been jabbering away for half an hour without coming up for a breath.  Other times he is as silent as he can be, just rolling his eyes at me, his mother.  I also find that there are times when all the rest of the house has gone to bed and in the quite and stillness of the house, he and I will sit up chatting, he asks me questions like "how do I get this guy at school to leave me alone" and "how do I get my ex-girlfriend to want to get back with me"?  It is these times that I must say it is such an honor to be his mom.  I am so happy to be able to be someone he can come to and ask questions.  I am so blessed that God chose me to be my son's mom.  I enjoy answering his questions, and hearing things like "Mom, you just dont know how hard school is these days!" and he is right.  School and peer pressure are probably harder today than  they were when I was a teenager, but then again, I am sure it felt just as hard to me then as it does to him now.  I try to give him good advise, and mostly I just try to listen.  I try to hear his heart to make sure he knows how much he is loved and how I would do just about anything for him.  I hear his struggles, and I am thankful that all the years of loving him, and building a foundation for him, it is paying off.  I know he is seeking Christ's guidance when he remembers to.  I wish he remembered more often, but I will allow God to be the one to make that change in my son.  I have raised him well, and I believe that with all of my heart.  I do not agree with his decisions, or the way he acts sometimes, but in the emulance of Jesus, I still give him Mercy and Grace just as the SON has given them to me.  Tonight, as my son was getting ready to go to bed, he walked into the office and without provication, he said, "G-night Mother, love you."  Sometimes it just feels so right to be his mom...

Hiding HIS words in my heart...

Memorizing is not something I am good at.  My daughter, however, is amazing.  She has recently taken to memorizing Bible Verses - not just the verse but usually the verses before and after so that it is in context and it "makes sense" to her.  Oh how I envy her (not in the Cardinal Sin kind of way just a little green around the edges).  I have never had an easy time of that.  Now I understand and can tell you the summary of the verse and how it applies, but to actually memorize and be able to recite chapter and verse - that just blows my mind. 

Though I have been one of God's chosen since I was quite young, I never really studied my Bible, never had an interest, but in the last 10 years or so I have become interested.  Recently my interest has been even greater.  At church we have been going through Ephesians, and I love it, I finally know where to go when reminding my kids that they are supposed to "honor (read: MIND) their father and mother..." It is in there, really it is and my teenage son, well he thought I was joking until I read it to him and pointed it out.  I love that all the answers to lifes questions are right there contained in the pages of HIS words.  How great is that!!  I do however wish I had a slightly more exhaustive concordance at times.  I know I have his words hidden in my heart somewhere, I just think I may have hidden them so well, I cant even find them myself...